How to Deal with a Family Member Who Has a Substance Use Disorder

Family in crisis over addiction, Photo credit: Google Images

 Having a family member who has a substance use disorder is a grueling mental, spiritual, and physical challenge. When you first learn that a family member is struggling with addiction, your first reaction may be to try to take control of the situation. Unfortunately, controlling behavior often produces little results and only exacerbates the problem. Many resources are available that can help you cope with a family member’s addiction.

5 Resources for Families of People Who Have Substance Use Disorders
1. 12-Step Programs
Popular groups for family members of people who have substance use disorders are:

• Al-Anon
• Nar-Anon
• Codependents’ Anonymous (CODA)
• Families Anonymous

Using the same 12 steps that are used in Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous, these programs will teach you how to resist the temptation to control your family member’s addiction and how to cope with the problems that are being presented by it.
 2. 12-Step Alternative Programs
You may not prefer 12-Step Programs for reasons such as disagreeing with their religiosity or philosophy. There are 12-step alternative groups for families of people who struggle with addiction such as SMART Recovery-Friends and Family that allow you to connect with other family members of addicted individuals and learn coping skills.
3. Mental Health Counseling
Speaking to a compassionate, trustworthy, and experienced mental health counselor can provide insight into your situation. Another benefit of mental health counseling is that it allows you to vent to an objective person. This will enable you to release negative emotions instead of bottling them up.
4. Intervention
While you may have seen the television show Intervention, newer research-based intervention models tend to focus on the entire family system. Even if your family member is not interested in going to rehab or making improvements, you can work with an interventionist on setting boundaries, avoiding enabling behaviors, and not falling for manipulation.
5. Psychoeducational Resources
Addiction treatment centers often offer workshops to help educate loved ones about addiction, psychopharmacology, and relationship dynamics. The internet is also an abundant source of informational articles, social media accounts, and blogs about addiction and its effects on families. Some good books that have been written about the subject are:

• The Lost Years by Kristina Wandzilak and Constance Curry
• Addicted Like Me by Karen Franklin and Lauren King
• The Joey Song by Sandy Swenson
• Codependent No More by Melody Beattie

Addiction is a Family Disease
Addiction is often referred to as a “family disease” because it puts distress on the entire family. Unlike the symptoms of cancer and diabetes that exist inside the sufferer’s body, the symptoms of addiction manifest in the sufferer’s behavior. This causes the people who are closest to the sufferer to react.

Your first knee-jerk reaction may have been to attempt to control the situation and put your life on hold until the addict in the family gets sober. The truth is that you can still live a happy life, regardless of whether the addict in the family gets into recovery or not. You can be free of the bondages of your family member’s addiction by practicing self-care and taking advantage of the available resources.

Bay Breeze Recovery Center offers a family program to help you cope with a family member suffering from addiction. Register for our next meeting by filling out the registration form on our website under “Family Support.

*Note: This is a sample piece, not written for an actual client.